Friday, 1 May 2009

Can laugh in retrospect.

There I was, naught but a surgery gown, feet in the stirrups.
The Doctor had just shown me a little bubble in my uterus on the ultrasound and told me it was my little embryo. He was removing his gloves and we were smiling anxious smiles and muttering "thank yous" "goodbyes" and comments about not wanting to see each other again. He flicked the switch to lower the lie-back chair, but the chair malunctioned and started tipping instead of lowering.

I was sliding spread eagled an uncovered into the lap of my (gay- for some reason it makes it funnier) Doc. He jumped up and back going "Whooooaa" (yeah - real chilvarous) and I desperatly tried to unhoik my legs from the holders so I could land on my feet (which I managed - yeah Barb). The Doctor/Patient relationship restored its balance and I said "See, even the chair doesn't want to see me anymore."

Tell me you funnies from the Stirrups.


Lori said...

Now I'm scared of the chair the next time I go in for a physical.

How long ago was this?

B said...

mmmmmmm about 2 months (that's no comfort is it!)

Phoebe said...

That's so great you can find something to laugh about! I'm still looking for my sense of humor.

S said...

If we didn't laugh...we'd go insane.r.

That's pretty funny.

Our doctor takes my feet, one by one and places them on his thighs, so there are no awkward sliding moments. It works in theory, most times.

Our ex-doctor gave us a LOT of privacy. (As if that tiny little rectangle shaped sheet really does any good). He'd walk in when I was "Ready" and walk out so I could get "Ready".

My current doctor stands there and watches me get my fat ass on the bed and spread my legs etc. Not cause he gets off on it, but because he's freaking overbooked.

Thanks for the smile today. I needed it.


S said...

p.s. thanks for the comment - I really do want one of those "alien(movie)" style hibernation chambers so I can wake up to live birth. Seriously, I'd forego all the happy stuff normal people get to cherish if I had that. sigh.

thanks mate. S

Mrs. Spit said...


Years ago I went to go and see a new Gyne. He was starting a new process - that he would come and talk to you before he examined you. We had our conversation, and he said "ok, hop up on the bed", and I looked at him, and I have NO IDEA what came over me, but I smiled and said "Don't I get dinner first?". He laughed so hard he dropped the speculum. . .

Michele said...

Not quite a stirrup story, but I was in the RE's office under a TINY little sheet with no pants/panties on. The door opens and our RE is there, and she wants us to move to the other room because the u/s machine is "better". So I walked, bare bottomed, to the other room! OMG, I could have died. Thank goodness no one else was there to see me!

B said...

Nice retort Mrs Spit - and thanks for the visual of you hopping between rooms bare bottomed Chele! Very...... Mr Bean.

Kami said...

Good stories! I don't have anything so interesting. It is funny how we become so comfortable in that position. I remember when I first started how I couldn't make eye contact with the doc and didn't talk during any procedures. Now I hop in the stirrups and say, "Tell me a story."